I think he's probably now the most senior member of the group. Maya Harris: We had a real kind of eureka moment last week, where we had an associate partner join our group for the first time. The timing of how we've been able to grow this, I think, has made it even more valuable. So you feel like you're maybe even more isolated. And particularly right now, right when we're all kind of out of our old normal routines due to the pandemic. I think just even having this little safe space where you have people that are going through some similar situations has been super valuable. And wouldn't it be great if we gave them the same gift that we've given each other? Maybe we should start a Slack group and see if we could connect to other folks." And just felt like there had to be more people like us in the company. But what's amazing is that every week almost we add someone new to the group.ĭavid DeLallo: Just your and my relationship gave me courage to do more at McKinsey. And we're now in a community of, I think, 27. And we cannot be the only two." And it turns out that's absolutely true. Because it's always been founded on this idea of "I cannot be the only one. Maya Harris: It's been great working with you and establishing our, kind of, our online community of other trans and nonbinary colleagues in the firm. That's all right." So, I mean, I think a lot of us -speaking for me, in my personal life -have lots of great friends. Everyone thinks I'm weird." (LAUGH)ĭavid DeLallo: And I would be like, "So am I. I'd have just come to you and gone, "David, it's all gone horribly wrong. But I think just this relationship, and had it gone wrong, I still wouldn't have been alone in it. Maya Harris: We've both been quite lucky in that we had really positive responses. Just to be able to have anybody in the company that was in a similar situation. And you probably didn't realize at the time that it was actually equally helpful to me. It's interesting because when our colleague came to me and asked if I minded if we got introduced, you know, it made it seem as if I could have so much insight for you. And in the best way possible.ĭavid DeLallo: Yeah. And then suddenly, I realized, like, turns out I was right. And I kind of had this sense of, "I cannot be the only one in a company this size." We're across the globe. Maya Harris: I'd known there'd been a couple of transgender colleagues in the past in the firm, but when I tried to look them up, they were no longer around. And to have somebody to share, you know, my thinking with was really helpful. Like, how do I do this just once?ĭavid DeLallo: Regardless of whether you had actually gone down the path, just knowing that you existed here in the company was helpful for me. So for me, it was only earlier this year.īut actually, like, looking back on it, those conversations and starting up those discussions was me saying, actually, I'm not the only who's having to figure this out and to think about exactly that problem. But you were going through that process long before I went through that process. I find it funny you telling that story like that, because it kind of sounds like I had all the answer for you. Would you mind if I connected her with you?" And I said, "Of course." And so one of the leaders of Equal at McKinsey, our organization for gay, lesbian, transgender colleagues was somebody that I reached out to to figure out how to navigate this process here.Īnd she happened to reach out to me over email and said, "Hey," you know, "there's another colleague who is transgender and is thinking about their process of coming out. What happened was I was in the middle of trying to figure out how I was going to announce my coming out in the in the firm. (MUSIC)ĭavid DeLallo: It was about two years ago. And actually having someone like you, who ’s shared a lot of that and has gone through the tough times and is enjoying the better times and still have those tough moments the same way that I still have those tough moments, that means a hell of a lot. Maya Harris: I ’m in a better place now than I ’ve been for a very long time.
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